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Design
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Product design, marketing design, print design, branding design, user experince design, information architecture
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Donut design
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Sprinkle art, icing design, eclair management, taste testing, donut/coffee pairing research
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Front-end Development
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HTML, CSS, CSS Preprocessors, jQuery, CoffeeScript, JavaScript, responsive design/adaptive layouts
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Craft beer brewing
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Hops inspection, brew testing, distribution management, bottle label design, festival and event management
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Back-end Development
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Jekyll, Ruby, Ruby on Rails, PHP, Liquid
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Family leadership
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Bread winning, conflict resolution, couch inspection, TV longevity testing
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Springfield College
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Associates Degree, Business Management • 1984 — 1986
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If you had any meaningful roles at college, feel free to write about them here.
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Springfield Nuclear Power Plant
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Outstanding Achievement • 2010
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Awarded for stopping a nuclear meltdown, even though I also started it.
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Duff Beer Customer of the year
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1997 — 2001, 2003, 2008 — 2012
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Honored by Duff Beer for being an outstanding customer several years straight. Qualifications included most beer consumed at a bar, most beer purchased, and most beer ralphed.
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Moe's Patron of the Month
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12/2001, 8/2004
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Specifically this prestigious awarded twice for stopping a robber with my belly.